I hangout in a group of 6, there are 3 couples. The one guy in the group (let’s call him Jim) has been one of my best friends since grade 8. Throughout the end of high school we disconnected for two years and reconnected when I began dating the girl I am with now. The other guy in the group, (let’s call him Bob) was Jim’s friend and I was introduced to Bob through Jim. They grew close together and because of that became best friends.
For the first 8 months all of us were hanging out and it was great! We all got along very well, however lately whenever all the couples hangout and go for diner, or do activities at someone’s house Bob constantly talks and directs all of his jokes and conversation to Jim. He includes Jim in everything and excludes not only me but others in the group. When I look at a setting like this, I try to treat everyone in the group equally, however I feel like Bob does not. For instance whenever we play a card game and there are partners Bob always insists on being Jim’s partner, never asks to be mine, or his girlfriends or another one of the group. This has begun to make me feel invisible. Jim has a similar personality as mine with being quiet and tends to do more listening than speaking sometimes. Bob is the complete opposite, he tries his heart out to make jokes and constantly talks. I’m not sure if I just don’t give him the reaction Jim does whenever Bob makes jokes and that’s why he gravitates towards him more?
It’s driving me nuts. I don’t think this is jealously, I don’t care they are friends I just tend to only care once he starts treating everyone else like they’re invisible. What do I do? Am I overreacting, or is this an actual reason to get upset and angry about? – Friend trouble in Kitchener
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